MORE INFO......

Go to http://rmhcrideforsickkidssa.com.au/ for more information on the RMHC Ride for Sick Kids SA

Monday 5 November 2012

Epilogue from the Muppets

Nov 5th (enough time for some reflection)

Tour Totals

Total Distance covered (source: the trusty Garmin 800, on Mr Lucas' Stallion)

1045.35 km  Port Lincoln - Adelaide (must have been that short trip out to the Pt Lowly Lighthouse!)

Total Time spent in Saddle

37 hrs 7 mins 48 secs approx (all but sneaky Pete that had two "work" spells in the bus!)

Average Speed for the entire trip

28.17 kmh (mainly due to Fi 1 & Fi 2, Kitty Kat & Sammy!)

Maximum Speed

61.4 kmh leading into the Barossa Novotel (The Machine had the fastest recorded speed on a flat @ 64.7 kmh! everyone deserves a Specialized!)

Fastest Day  Lincoln - Cleve @ 32.3 kph average

Longest Day Wallaroo - Barossa 7hrs 47 mins, 217.56 km!

Maximum Cadence 141 on the last day (must have borrowed Jaws bike for a spell, as he was now enjoying a 53 - 53!)

Maximum Heart Rate 188 during TT (may have been the thought of the oncoming vehicle as we strayed across the line, highest peak outside of TT was 176 bpm) Not sure if Blads pushed over the 100 bpm on the bike, may have at times, as he sighted the nearest amenities along the way.)

Other Stats  2 Days had average speed above  30 kmh, with 6 out of 7 days being above 28 kmh. (not a bad effort over 7 days and 1000 km's, well done to all)

Best performance after a few drinks  Sneaky Pete, for his bravery going through the Pichi Richi Pass.  Well done little Honey Badger.


Honey Badger at Port Lincoln

 Honey Badger during day 1


Honey badger during the Pichi Richi pass after 15 drinks the previous night!

 



Yellow Jersey & Muppet Awards

Day 1 Sturmy - Maillot Jaune (Outstanding contribution to the organising of event)    No Muppet award for first day    

Day 2 Jason 'Jiz,Jaws' Stephens - Maillot Jaune. (something to do with rooming with the previous holder of the MJ!            Fi 1 - Muppet (kermit) for dropping bidon at the front of the Peloton

Day 3 Chloe  - Maillot Jaune. On behalf of hers and the entire support crews efforts and hard work                    Mr Lucas - Muppet, for indiscretions too numerous to mention

Day 4 Fi 2 - Maillot Jaune. Mainly due to her ability to tear everyone elses legs off at anytime, Outstanding example of  Rule # 2 Lead by example & Rule # 8.        Chris 'Blads' Halley - Muppet, for a cardinal safety breach when suffering from white line fever!

Day 5 Ian 'Spike, Afrikaan, Erns, Jens, the man from Notting Hill, Baby Stretch, New Boy, Lassie, Rooi, Nek and Aeroplane Speed Cop' Fromentin (these have been taken from the Autobiography 'A Seoff Efrican in Seoff Estraalia, a man with a pocket full of full stops!) - Maillot Jaune.  As the best man servant among us, and the ability to open doors for strangers and do the laundry for anyone wearing yellow!     Todd 'Dark' Knight - Muppet, for another safety Breach and not adhering to Rule # 1 & 2, also possibly for breaching rule # 22!

Will the Real Spike, please stand up!!


Day 6 Mr Lucas - Maillot Jaune.  Birthday present & media committments etc etc etc           Ian 'Spike' Fromentin - Muppet, for safety breach on Team leaders bike,  Rule # 1 & 2 & 16 (please refer to www.velominati.com/the-rules/#51 for rule key, thanks Blads, the rule keeper)     

Day 7 Three way tie for Maillot Jaune Blads, The Machine & Ben, for adhering to all said rules for the duration of the ride and just being great blokes!      Craig 'Sterling' Stirna (name change for his ability to dig deep enough to find precious minerals, and after his childhood hero and lookalike Peter Sterling!) - Muppet, for waking up fellow roomy for no apparent reason and then preceeding to belt out a trumpet recording worthy of being on the Titanic, prior to said roomy taking his place in his previous restful state!)

Awards also handed out to young Sammy, for impersonating any rider on EPO or the like in playing the guess who game.

Fraudient Slip award to Sturmy for a comment best left unsaid.

Fashion award to both Spike and his boardies and the inked up arm warmers of Fi 2 (Fi 2 actually wins this as she looked cool, refer rule # 8)

Well thats how it ends, until we meet again maybe from Mt Gambier to Adelaide on our next Ride for Sick Kids, who knows.

Total Funds Raised $unsure, will update when a firmer amount is known.  Should be between $80 - $100k nett profit for the Ronald McDonald House Adelaide.

I will attach photos of each rider and support crew with corresponding names for the amusement and for nostalgia (re: Wikipedia - nostalgia, describes a sentimental longing for the past, typically for a period or place with happy personal associations.),  I hope this rings true for you all as it does with me.

Thank you and Dankie Meneer Fromentin, die plesier was al myne!

Back Row L - R : Curtis, Button, Stifler, Todd, Sturmy, Twinkle Toes, Ben, Blads, Bronte, Sneaky Pete, Sammy, Fi 1, Spike, Kitty Kat, Mr Lucas, Kaarle McCulloch, Sterlo, Fi 2, Diesel, Dave, Jaws.

Front Row L - R : Chloe, Foxy Lady, Sam, Karl (lying down), Wendy, Grant, Tony.


Twits in Lycra!

L - R : Fi '1 (Miss Piggy)' Neuwirth, Tony 'Para' Mason, Alex 'Sneaky Pete' Carepetis, Craig 'Sterlo' Stirna, Dave Murada, Jason 'jaws' Stephens, Jami 'Twinkle Toes' Hodge, Carolyn 'Foxy lady' Fox, Chris 'Blads' Halley, Fiona 'Fi 2' Yard, Chloe 'Yellow' Watts, Sam 'young Sammy' Fromentin, Katherine 'Kitty Kat' Lee, Ian 'Spike' Fromentin, Steve 'Sturmy' Sturm, Jack 'Button' Buttons, Craig 'Stifler, The Machine' Cotter, Todd 'The Dark' Knight, Peter 'Diesel' Wolters, Wendy Robinson, Bronte 'Saurus' Mclaughlin, Neil 'Mr Lucas' Lucas, Curtis 'Cageman' Allen, & karl 'Che' Hardy or Mr Schnell!

Glenn 'Grant' Bowyer - photographer

Group photo with clean cars by Glenn 'Grant' Bowyer outside the Barossa Novotel


Top of Mt lofty with Kaarle McCulloch and Nathan


Best Bike Store in the State!!!!!! BIKE SOCIETY!!!

Check out the bling from Cotter



Saturday 3 November 2012

The Great Muppet Caper draws to a close!

Nov 1st Barossa Novotel - Mt Lofty - Ronald McDonald House (The Finish Line)

Today would have 5 catergorised climbs and two KOM's (Cudlee Creek to Lobethal & Mt Lofty Summit)

Total Time 4 hrs 43 mins & 35.62 secs approx.

Total Distance 105 kms (7th day in a row over 100 kms, average daily distance 148 kms!)

Maximum Speed 55.1 kph (up deviation Rd if I recall?)

Total Gain 1414 metres (nothing nice to see here thanks Ben!) Total Descent 1619 metres

Total calories spent 2379  (Total calories to give 0!)

Average Speed 22.1 kph (was a long couple of climbs for tired legs)

The morning mist rolled over the green hills surrounding the picturesque setting of the Barossa Novotel, and the November Spring day was not far off an English Summers day, about -3 c it felt like as the arm warmers, jackets and ink arms of Fi 2 made their way back into the peloton.
After a more casual briefing time and no girls running on time, with last minute preening before the vehicles were aligned and models and bikes or no bikes made their way for the final group photo shoot. Grant had been up early to meticuously clean all vehicles by hand, after a brief trip to the Gawler carwash the previous night, was found to be closed! Well done Grantly.
We waved goodbye to the school girl (sorry Journo) that had arrived to take our photo, and were glad to roll down the 18% hill with heavy legs and the emotional thought of riding out the last 100 kms in mind, the pace was not held back.
The undulating terrain as we headed through some home turf for some was slowly taking its toll, but all dug deep and we pushed onto our first nature break in  more civilised amenities for Fi 1 and Blads to leave their marks!
As the machine and Bronte rolled in and out to make it to Lobethal before us, we regrouped to slowly tick off the k's as we went.  I had now stumbled across the old Footy room ointment, thanks to Jaws, and liberally applied the dencorub to appreciating thighs. As Jaws thanked me for this gesture, I applied to myself also, and we rolled out to our next point of Cudlee Creek. We snaked our way through chain of ponds and stopped outside the Cudlee Creek caravan and a wildlife park that many of the Peleton would feel quite at home in, prior to the first KOM at your own pace was on.
This is a long climb that winds its way up to Stinky's adopted hamlet of Fairyland Lobethal.
With the bunch split, and the lead pack of Sturmy, Jaws, Billy Goat Ben, the Africaaaaan connection of Spike & Sammy,  Fi 2,  & Toddly, went to an early lead.  With Kitty Kat, Button, Mr Lucas & Fi 2 having missed the jump, a desperate attempt to close the gap was on, and with 100 metres closing on some of the early leaders, I dropped off the wheel of Button, who had given me a great ride in, but in the large ring still and the prospect of many more climbs to come, I eased off and thought better to finish than not finish at all, regardless of time.  A wise man had once said to me, "Neil, there is ambition, and there is ability, wise not to get them confused", thanks Blads for your words of wisdom, and with this in mind, saw me spin a nice pace that would get me to Lobethal well before the coffee was cold.
The rest of the crowd, had huge support from Murada, Diesel, and Blads himself, as their words of encouragement saw all of us make it to Lobethal safely, with something still in the tank to get us home.  Amazingly, Machine and Bronte had actually beaten us all to Lobethal with their small head start, and a slight tilt of the head to the machine, to offer our congratulations to a massive effort was given.
To the victors go the spoils and the International flavour of this event was evident, by the lack of home grown Aussies on the dias.
The Africaaaaaan connection of father and daughter duo, saw them take gold and silver respectively with the Kiwi spinning like mad chasing the fluffly wool prize he had been promised, took out a credible Bronze.  The Billy Goat had removed himself from the race and had instead perched himself on the top of the climb like a proud father watching his flock parade in as we ticked off another challenge for the week. After the last week and in typical Aussie fashion, we were all Aussies now anyway!
A stop at the cycling friendly Lobethal Bakery for a feed and Hot Coffee, and we were diving for bags in the truck to find enough clothes to keep us warm as we were approaching what was surely to be a snow covered Mt Lofty in this weather. As Karl 'Che' Hardy attempted to surreptitiously sell some more Schnells to those among us that had not enjoyed the smooth ride they had given 3 of us through out this ride, by being a gentleman and offering jackets to Fi 1 & Kitty Kat in the vain hope of a sale! Nice one Karl.  On reflrction, it would appear that CheHardy was being none other than the chivalrous man he has been all along, and his thoughts were much appreciated by the damsel's in distress.
The marquee and food packed away by the ever hard working support crew and we were off, with our last challenge in mind and a Lunch with Kaarle McCulloch on the menu awaiting.
On making our way to the summit of Mt Lofty, every conceivable ascent had been located by Ben on hes recon, with the exception of Checkers Hill (largely due to the fact that the road was closed!), and it had turned into a day of attrition with Fi 2, Diesel, Spike, Ben, Sam and Sturmy all doing an outstanding job in the front six, (im not completely sure that this six is correct as I was concentrating on breathing and pedaling as the two things that were keeping me alive!).
As the sight of the towers on the summit of Mt Lofty were breifly in sight with the parting of some menacing clouds, we decided that deviation road would be a fun way to finish us off before the final 3 km ascent.  It was at this moment (actually it was as I left the abolutions block on the previous stop), I had said to Fi 1, that in future, a phone call from Ben, would be vetted to the voicemail to ensure that I couldnt say yes to anything!).
After rueing the fact that an Ultegra 11-28 had been delivered to my house only 239 kms away, and that the 25 had no more reprieve for me, I took some solace in the heavy breathing around me (not unlike the previous night hey Stinky?), and the ever reliable Kiwi Jaws, openly admitting he to was completely spent!, and the moment of madness he had had, to take the front into a block headwind upon leaving the Novotel, was now a thought he had wished he had not had. (if only a little more time applying his make up in the morning, there may have been something left in the tank).
Jaws pushed and pulled on his pedals and said "you know that moment when the light on the fuel guage in the car finally goes out?, thats where I am!).
Over the rise and a stop for our last challenge and the Party Pies that awaited.  The friendly and generous Blue rinse brigade that were lining up for a coffee (or the pearly gates to open), were a lot further away from those gates than some of us felt, as we made a last ditch effort to finish this ride in a fashion that would do us justice.
We assembled at the base and had three kilometeres between us and our reward, having now just clicked over 1000 kms in the previous 6 1/2 days, we organised where in the group we would go from.  The supportive guys rolled back to help some of us over this last hurdle, and a few took off to race to the top.............this was not a race so much as an emotional climb and as each pedal represented the toil we had endured and the fun we had had along the way as we edged forward to the summit.
As the group split into their seperate worlds with a line that reminded me of scenes from the climbing of Hillary's step on Everest by mountaineers, only I had no oxygen to offer either them or myself.
I rolled next to Kitty Kat, in the hope of being supportive to the top, only to find that it was soon to be her support I required. As a slow motion call of debris middle was called with the rest of the peloton in iminent danger, a muffled and distant laugh was heard, that made the next 100 metres that little less hard.  Down past the Lofty House and the last little push from the 53-25 (thanks Curtis, stroke of genius had been had yesterday with this change, also had by Diesel! "Great minds think alike, Fools seldom differ" you can make the call there) and the car park was there.  With Sturmy urging on Fi 1, Kitty Kat and myself to make it through the car park, the realisation of this acclompishment was overwhelming, and the spectacular sight of Adelaide was a sight to behold.
As each rider made their way round the side of the Lofty Complex, a raucous applause welcomed them in and the party pies, pizza and sandwiches were laid on.
We sat down to lunch with Kaarle & Nathan (who incidently had used two sets of legs to make the ascent, or at least that is what his quads looked like), there was an air of glowing achievement around the tables as we walked around with chests out, beaming smiles and glassy eyes, we knew only a descent, a visit to a school and the bike society shop for some much needed retail therapy and the House, family and friends, Ronald McDonald and His Excellency Rear Admiral Kevin Scarce AC CSC RANR Governor of South Australia and his wife Mrs Liz Scarce awaited us. What a proud moment for us all.
We descended at a leisurely pace with Ben leading us out in single file with Kaarle on his wheel.  Apparently there was quite a view on this descent, but sitting on Triple World Champion & Olympic Bronze medallist, Kaarle's Wheel, I found it dificult to concentrate on anything else! I was concious of  headlines that, inadvertently bringing down one of our brightest Sprint track cyclists in the country would appear, and I was desperate to avoid this.  My nervousness was apparent with the smoke eminating from my brakes, and an early call of a road sign of an echidna, in which I mysteriously called "Wombats!", 3/4's of the way down.
Safely down, and the Peleton made its way along Greenhill Rd to Goodwood Primary school for our last talk and bike giveaway.
With the pleasure of giving our last talk and introducing  Kaarle to the kids (although she was ready to take the mike from media man prematurely), our duties were nearly complete.
We rode to the now infamous Bike Society Store on the corner of Anzac Rd & South Road www.bikesociety.com.au where Curtis had been feverishly re pricing items in the shop for the vulnerable prey entering the shop, ready to trade up to something that would make the next 1000 km journey that much more comfortable, and the machine morphed from extreme cyclist to salesman with the consumate ease we had become accustomed to, and as each shiny knew frame set was taken from the box and paraded around the group and the frenzied bike buying Diesel was foaming at the mouth.
As we waited for the go ahead to mount for the final stretch home, we had a moment to all sign a yellow jersey, that will hang in the Bike Society store, knowing that we will be the only people to have the honour to do so. The machine obviously had got to know some of us well enough, that the opportunity to come back and view this one off piece of memorabilia, would have us back in the store and leaving with grin on the face and  pain in pocket, when he had sold us a 6th bike that was not required!
Then it was here, on bikes and making our way through the middle of Adelaide, parading our Peacock like feathers like soldiers coming home (only in Lycra and on bikes), from an indescribable experience and ringing our pesky bells, thanks to young Sammy.
After catching every conceivable red light and the thought of anyone falling over at the last hurdle averted, we rounded the bend from the Women's & Children's hospital to be welcomed by all and sundry that had been eagerly awaiting the safe return of their Husbands, Wifes, Sons, Daughters and Mums and Dads.  We rolled through the crowd proud as punch and down into the carpark to park our rides for the last time on this trip.
We had done it, Seven days ago we had started our journey from Port Linclon, with the insane idea of pedaling our way around the Gulf, through the Adelaide Hills and into Adelaide itself, and why wouldnt you?
With formalities out of the way, Thanks to Ben and His Excellency the Governor of South Australia (apologies are extended to his Excellency and Mrs Liz Scarce from the author, upon discovering that his Excellency had indeed been following our journey on the blog, for any reference that could have been deemed innapropiate, which may have been most of it sorry).
We were treated to celebrity like status with photos champagne and canapes and the warm hugs, kisses and congratulations from family and friends.  Amidst the celebrations was the reason for the journey in the first place, sitting watching the ceremony was some children of the house, and these were the kids and families we had done this for, and yes, there was no pain for any of us as we set out and achieved for these families that were less fortunate than we currently were.  I hope that in some small way we have contributed to making their lifes slightly better for the future and we thank the outstanding jobs that Jane Scotcher (House Manager) and the amazing volunteers do day in day out for the better of other people.  This reward will stay with myself and the other riders and support crew forever and we thank you for the priveledge of this chance to be involved!

I had sent an email to Ben, referring to his statement at our first briefing in Port Lincoln that this would be a life changing experience.  A cliche sometimes over used, but certainly not in this instance, between the individuals on this ride, from support crew to riders, to the families and communities met along the way. The excited school children on our visits, the exquisite hospitality and quisine along the way (special mention to the McDonald's Restaurants and crew along the way), and we have truly experienced a time in our lifes that will be hard for any of us to explain.
I hope that in some small way, albeit inhouse and sometimes difficult to follow, this blog has allowed families and friends an opportunity to join in on our unique experience and feel that they to were part of our journey and fun.  I certainly have enjoyed the opportunity to journal our trials and tribulations along the way and hope that you have too.

Until next time, to a group of inspirational people that I will dearly miss, enjoy some time off the bike and recuperating from saddle sores and bruising, and time back with your families.

Thank you all and goodbye for now

Mr Lucas
The Blogger SA R4SK

 Panorama of the Group at Goodwood Primary


 

 Goodwood Primary

From Left.....Fi 1, Kitty Kat, Diesel, Stinky, Toddly & SA R4SK Ambassador Kaarle McCulloch

The cassette that never was!!

 

Thursday 1 November 2012

Mr Lucas's Birthday

Oct 31st Wallaroo - Gawler via the rest of the world!

Total Time 7hrs 47 mins 06.62 secs approx

Total Distance 218Km's yes thats right a 200km ride to cap it off.

Average speed 28 kmh into a ferocious head wind when the maillot jaune Blew up

Total Gain 1070 metres Total Descent 842 metres

Max speed 61.4kph as Mr Lucas rolled into the Novotel Barossa

Total calories burnt 3436 Total sugar intake 4000 calories

How to spend one's birthday, or not?


I looked over, sucking in what little oxygen I could from the hot October air, sitting on the nose of the peleton into a 70 kmh (approx only) cross/head wind, I could all but think 'Bloody Kiwi's', as Jaws gleefully replied on my behalf, that there was no need to roll early as we were doing fine!!!
This was how the day was to be as legs started to pop down the line and we darted for what little protection there was when we were only 85 km's into our longest stretch of 218 km's.

The day began quite leisurly at 4.30 am for a 5.30 am briefing and a dark start, albeit the headlight that had been stolen from the truck and attached to the Bladders bike overnight. (maybe sneaky Pete's last helping hand as we waved goodbye to the Honey badger, or was he too busy elsewhere??), and down to Kadina at the very suprising and luxurious Bellagio.  Not only a great Brekky and the Owners had graciously come in and opened 3 hrs earlier than normal for us, but a chance for me to complete some artwork on the wall, that I had neglected overtime.  After a brief interlude with the static chef out the front, we rolled out with nervous energy as the long day in the saddle had begun.

A beautiful rolling ascent over the Hummocks and down the other side into Lochiel, was without too much drama, until..............Kitty Kat at the head of the pack had endured a nasty little nose bleed.  This incident itself had no impact on the peleton as Kitty Kat just kept on pedaling as the women in the peleton kept showing how strong they are.  The drama unfolded as the Fruedian slip award was handed out to Sturmy!!  This parapraxis, was completely oblivious to Sturmy until moments after, he re thought his previous comment through his head, and the realization that he had made a monumental balls up quickly dawned, as the peleton broke down in rapturous laughter! (the graphic nature of his comment has to remain within the peleton sorry, or you may ask Sturmy to explain when you see him next).  A quick 55km's checked off. The bunch were feeling confident and were itching to get on the bikes.

We had a short stretch in an Easterly direction towards Clare, when the North/Easterly we had enjoyed so much getting to Wallaroo had turned against us and the six at the front where going to endure a harrowing next 35km's, with it not much better down the line. Starting six, Sturmy, Ben/Bernadette, Button, Diesel, Mr Lucas (Maillot Jaune) and Jaws.  For the first 15 mins all was good and Sturmy was looking forward to a roll and sitting in third wheel, when Bernadette, true to form, peeled off the front and gently rolled to the rear of the peleton, and signalled for the Bladder to come forward. The ever willing deputy came forward with much vigour abd took his place on the nose next to the now not so delighted Sturmy, only to turn to him and say "right maate, fifteen minutes till rolling"! As the rest of the rolling six breathed a sigh of relief, knowing full well that our turn was to be delayed, the sinking feeling in Sturmy's stomach was mainly due to an ill devised plan from Jaws and Sturmy, they had  planned to ride the entire leg (218kms) in the front six, and now after 40 mins into a gale force wind, their plan was showing its first cracks.

We eventually rolled, and Jack and Diesel took their place and belted out an average pace into the wind at race pace and the popping began, one can only imagine what was happening in the bunch and with Stifler at the back as he worked tirelessly to keep the peleton together.  There was an eerie hush over us all as we peered down to our Garmins and Fi 2's new 800 wasnt showing her any joy.  We were 75 kms into a massive day and the previous 700kms under our legs were starting to take there toll.  As we each went into our own cavenous black hole and dug deep to keep things rolling.
I hung onto Diesels wheel knowing full well that the next fifteen minutess were to bring little reprieve and the countdown to rolling was not music to my ears.  With the yellow jersey on, and "Rolling" belted out by the Bladder, Jaws and I headed out into the abyss to push through the wind.
Where the Heck (or words to that effect) is that turn off? We all thought, and after a what I thought was a reasonable effort and my head saying he will call rolling soon wont he? I looked down to see only 3mins 30 secs had passed!  On to 8 mins called and the sound of my legs popping were heard in Equatorial Guinea,  along with the laughter from The Bladder! Only Jaws was  mysteriously oblivious to this fact and as previously said, quite happily answered for the now speechless Mr Lucas that everything was fine! Thanks Jiz!
With a call from the earpiece and the knowledge that the turnoff was infact only 400 metres until there was a tailwind like no other, the crafty Bladder called "Rolling" and moved forward to take his place. 
Radio Duties Call......I will be back.  Sorry that was quite some interview.
As the flickering hazard lights of Karl's lead vehicle turned to one single right indicator, a communal sigh of releif was heard from the peleton in unison, and we turned South for a much appreciated tail wind at our backs.  A quick stop for a refuel and Bladder, we quickly moved on for fear of a change in weather conditions onwards towards balaklava and lunch at the Royal Hotel. Having made it this far today, even the thought of our 53rd Chicken Parmy was still appealing. 
Much delight fell over the group as we sat down to a Pasta bake, Chicken Honey stir fry and a curry cassserole that I stayed away from for fear of renal repercussions down the road.  By the sound of Sturmy and Jaws thundering down the road they had not made the same wise decision! Following a great feed at the Royal we headed off from Balaklava to Gawler for the now famous McFlurry moment, it had appeared that Blads (formerly known as Bladder, but now i was so spent that names needed to be shortened in the peleton venacular), had consumed only McFlurries as his source of sustanance for the previous 850 kms!
The Kouta KOM of the much loved Dave 'I have another one liner' Murada, suffered another mechanical and the now spent Machine cautiously used Curtis the cage man to time trial back to the group that was enjoying a spell from the pace against the crosswind.
We finally made it to the turn off towards Gawler and the rolling downhill and speed had everyones spirits lifted as we got closer to enjoying a bevvy and celebrating a milestone 200 km day for most of us. (not sure if I would be encouraged to do this on one's Birthday!).
A stop at the Gawler McDonald's and a reprieve before the final push home to the luxurious Novotel in the Barossa and some were feeling like they had reached their backyard.
This final 20-30km was not an easy roll, and as the pressure was on to make it back for the most anticipated celebrations of Mr Lucas' Birthday, there was no letting up. There was either a grin or grimace from Jaws & Sturmy as they pushed towards finishing the day from the front and they kept the pace all the way to the Novotel turn off, well done lads for a tough day in the saddle and leading the way.  To Stinky, Twinkle Toes & Bronte saurus, well done for one of the toughest days we had endured, with Blads and the Machine doing everything in their power to encourage and inspire us to all get home safely, what an effort!
The Novotel turn off finally arrived and as we gently turned left, we were all salivating the sweet taste of victory and an iced cold Bevvy.  Those that are not aware of the area, the Barossa Novotel sits perched ontop of a hill that has an 18% gradient road and driveway into it, just what we were all looking forward to at the end of 7hrs in the saddle.
Saddle sores aside and thoughts of 'maybe I should have bidded on the Aussie Butt cream', the Maillot Jaune was called forward to lead the peloton home. Unfortunately this was short lived, as I gave it a punch on the downhill leading in reaching 61.7 kph, this was only enough to give billy goat Ben a good run in as he saunterd past me.  I sat back down and filtered down through the gears of my 53-23 and rued that the 25 was not on the back, as the rest of the group made their way past, from Fi 2 to Jaws on his 45 chasing the 'son of' down, we finally crested and rolled down to the reception area all having grown that little bit more.  As the congratulations were passed around, the dawning of the conclusion of this charity ride was iminent, and some introspective thoughts had us recalling memorable moments that we would be taking home with us.  The group had somehow become one, and a feeling of family and belonging was one that I will not forget. It was odd, looking for individuals to thank and hug, that was each and everyone, and knowing that this would be our last night spent together was starting to pull on the heart strings.
It was around 5.30pm and enough time only to have a shower & shave and make our way back for another nigh of fun & frivolity and suck down some much deserved cold ones.
Another great night had and some good auction bidding had us raise another $5000 plus for the charity and some time to reminisce over the past 6 days riding with a slide show by Karl, Bade and Curtis, that showed just how much fun we had had as a group of stangers travelling these country roads of SA.
Plenty of Muppet moments, with some near misses for some and Sturmy nearly clinching it, the award went to Craig (Stinky) for a Faux Pas that had Karl 'Che' Hardy woken from a peaceful sleep at 1am  in the morning, to check if it was ok for young Craig to have a qiuck gaf? much to Karl's delight, these preceedings took place, and the Stink was quickly asleep and trumpeting out a Blue Whale melody that Karl struggled to get back to sleep with!
A public embarrasing moment at tea for Fi 1 as we recalled her calls to nature along the way.  Although we had named Chris 'Blads', Fi 1 is  the only person I know who can be undressed on the bike before we have stopped and in the bushes regardless of surroundings or spectators (as one little boy's holiday experience will be testament to!).
We had a touching talk from the famous young 19 yr old cyclist's, Shamus Liptrot's Father, Malcom, as they live in Balaklava and had made it down for our last community celebration night with a heartfelt story, had us all reaching for what napery we could to wipe away the tears and compose ourselves.
With the Muppet award done and some nervous moments in the Auction with Ben's proxy playing coy and the prospect of me arriving home with a 6th bike to explain to my wife Katherine, and the thought of the Tahitian Pearls coming earlier than i had anticipated, we finaly got Ben a new SL4 Roubaix and an additional birthday present avoided for me. We had some great bidding for the final nights opportunity to pick up some great gifts and the last opportunity to donate to the cause for many of us.
The time to hand over the coveted yellow jersey was among us and with the jersey comes the pressure.  Part of me wanted to ride for another 13 days to give everyone on the ride an opportunity to receive the jersey, with all the work that everyone had accomplished. I could go through all that were deserving, but that would have been us all, from the tenacious and fearless Fi 1, the bleeding Kitty Kat forever with a smile on her face, Twinkle Toes and Stinky who had dug deeper than most people can go, for guys that are not on the bike for km after km on a normal weekly basis, lesser men would have bailed and been on the bus, but not these two (sneaky Pete fits in this catergory for his effort up the Pichi Richi pass, that few thought he would make it through, except the baby machine did have to "do some work" on the bus from Wilmington to Murray Town!). Jack Button, who was the quiet achiever and a very acclompished rider and was always a pleasure to ride alongside with a demeanour that just made you happy to be alive, Multple named Murada that rode with a pocketful of one liners that came from the depths of depravity at times, but none the less took the sting out of your legs as you were too busy laughing, Bronte Saurus, who at 68 yrs old and the dogged determination to make it to the end, the whole time enduring the ride with a 23 on the back, made us all hope we to would still be riding at his age. That leaves the lead riders Bade, the Machine and Blads along with the engine like Diesel who just keeps on keeping on & the machines protege Todd who gets a little enthusistic when the sprint line approaches, and both had been used effectively to provide cover on those days when crosswinds hit the group.  As the rest of the bunch had deservedly received the opportunity to don the yellow jersy (present company excepted), the descision was once again made to break the rules, and all three lead riders were given the chance to wear the jersey for stages of the final day, with Blads to lead us out, the machine to ride into work with it on and Bade to ride us into the house.  I think all of us would agree that these guys & girl, were the reason that all of us had made it this far, and we owed them a great deal of grattitude for giving each and everyone of us the enormous thrill of completing this adventure.
Lights out for most as the Murada and crew kicked on, and apologies for leaving my favorite birthday card ever in the bar overnight (has been recalimed by its rightful owner), and the dreamy thoughts of riding to the lofty heights of the Mount itself was upon us.
A quick spoon with the Stink, thanks to the pranksters Jaws and Sturmy, that had rearanged the apartment with beds and furniture that saw our our room turned into a private boudoir, and too tired to change back we tucked ourselves in for a final rest.

What an unbelievable way to spend a birthday, and after having a recording of my kids and wife singing Happy Birthday to me in the morning, it is a day I will never forget.  With the knowledge that Sturmy had taken the Fruedian slip award instead of me and an acheivement of the ride itself.  I had been spent during the day and strange as it sounds, this made me lay my weary head on the soft pillow and drift off to sleep with a grin like ronald himself.  Mr Lucas was indeed a happy man, and thank you to all the support crew and riders that made the day so special and unforgettable!

Only the Mount to go!!!!!!!!!........or so we thought

Neil

The Bellagio Kadina for Brekky, Toddly, Stifler, Stinky and Spike


Poor Tony our Paramedic and the sadistic Sam!

The day missed by the Maillot Jaune

Oct 30th Port Pirie - Pt Broughton - Kadina - Wallaroo

Total Time 3 hrs 51 mins 49.62 secs approx.

Total Distance 118kms

Maximum velocity 47.9km (by the Springboks)

Total gain 288 metres Total descent 287 metres

Total calories consumed by Mr Lucas 1759

Max Heart rate The Bladder 99 bpm!! (accuracy testing to be completed!)

Average Speed 30.5 kph after the yellow jerseys blitzed us home

Rule 22, part C point 3, clearly states "The holder of the maillot Jaune is not required to participate in any strenuous activity that may impede his/her performance".

As the current holder of the much coveted Maillot Jaune, thats all I have to say about today!

Neil


PS Appeal has been upheld and on the handing in of the Maillot Jaune I will be encouraged to provide a more detailed blog of the days preceedings.

 Chloe and the Butt Cream with Grant looking on trying to keep down his Brekky!

 Kadina Maccas and Lunch for all, thanks guys!

 Panorama of Morning Tea at Port Broughton, thanks to the owners of Pallate 2 Pallate for opening up and giving us a great morning coffee.

Hard place to stop for a feed crew, well done.

 
 

 McFlurry Man (Bladder or Blads)

Men @ Work (Dave 'the phone' Murada & Jaws)



Tuesday 30 October 2012

The Muppet train continues!

Oct 29th Port Augusta - Quorn - Melrose - Pt Germein - Pt Pirie and home to my babies!

Total Time 6hrs 20mins & 6.57 secs (approx) including rolling to the outskirts of Pirie and back.

Total distance 182 km

Average speed 30 kmh (excludes the tv modelling and school visits)

Max speed 58.6 km

Total gain 953 metres total descent 957 metres

Calories cooked 3248 (good day in the saddle)

Wind North Easterly (great for most of the day)

An early morning rise to beat the sun up and down the local expertly operated McDonald's for the most scrumptious breakfast to date! Raisin toast, mighty muffins for those of us that are mighty, and 2 dozen B&E muffins for Stifler, thanks to the great staff for having us fed and on our way earlier than anticipated. Great job guys & girls.
With the bellies & vehicles full, we were paraded out onto National Highway 1 by the Schnell twins and a full peleton made their way to the base of our trek into the Flinders.
With a well devised plan of splitting the peleton into two speed groups (Number of Women in G1 4, Number of Women in G2 none excluding Sneaky!).
To Sneaky's amazement he had been allocated the wrong group and after much protest, the judges decision was final, and he under durees took his place on Davo's wheel.
As the distant shimmering reflection from the 44 spinning teeth of Jaws cassete, gradually dissapeared from view, we began the climbing through some of the most picturesuqe scenery the peleton and grupetto had seen. The couple of drinks Sneaky had had the night before and transformed the man into hill climbing billy goat as he hung tirelessly to Dave's wheel through the 15 k's of undulations.  Twinkle Toes and Stinky were right in there two as they made light work of the rolling hills, and with Stifler and Bladder in the rear guiding the grupetto back into contention and keeping Bronte on the pace, we enjoyed the introduction into the ranges.  Not quite knowing where the peleton was they had briefly slippped out of site, we knew we were still a chance of hanging in as a distraction too big not to adversly affect the leading bunch was seen............3 sheep had made their way on the wrong side of the fence and onto the road, and appeared to be far more frightened of men in bikes than any vehicles. One can only imagine what had happened only moments before as Jaws was presented with this gift or conundrum?

The Honeybadger moment was only to be seen by G2, as one may have been mistaken when explaining to Sneaky to push hard as this was the last climb before he could soft pedal 10 k's down into Quorn.  The sheer delight in those dinner plate eyes, to know he had made it through sitting on Daves wheel all the way and could now relax, was shortlived as he had been told this on the penultimate hill, and as we cornered the next bend and Sneaky peered around Dave's backside just willing the road to be going down and it not.................... a shattered man was now in G2!

On this penultimate climb, I was given the go ahead to push on for KOM glory, as I stepped out in the 53-12, and exploded to the top of the hill with the knowledge that the win was in sight, I looked over as a very desperate man pushed past with ease towards the lavatory that he had just seen the sign for and KOM honours were handed to the much loved pusher/bladder Chris Halley!

One more push and G2 was up and over and the boys rolled into Quorn around 30 seconds behind G1 (give or take 10mins)!
Morning Tea, again laid on and ready to go in the little town of Quorn. Hats off to all the support crew again, who have worked tirelessly day in & out and continue to do so with a smile.

Just 150kms to go and a tight schedule to visit some very excited children at Mid North Christian College meant that with a slight breeze on our tail the tempo was punched out to Wilmington & onto Melrose, where some quiet fell across the group, as we were all enjoying the memory of the climb & descent through the morning pass.  What a great ride Button whispered to me as  I turned to see his ear to ear grin beaming, for the ride we had just come had.  As the wind picked up a notch, so did the pace and Fi 1 & Fi 2 while both still in the front rolling six, were now seperated by a Kiwi, who was not letting go of a fine tempo that saw us hold 38 - 42kph as we hammered it to Murray Town. 

To be continued............................I somehow have just deleted an hours typing and will have to catch up tommorrow. Sorry but media committments from Mr Lucas took precedence over blog.  I will update on completion of the tour, sorry for the inconvienience.

 Oh Button...........The Pain the Pain!!!!

Twinkle Toes and the Button raising money the most painful way possible!

Sunday 28 October 2012

Muppets arrive in Augusta!

Oct 28th 2012 Whyalla - Point Lowly - Port Augusta

Total Time : 4hrs 34mins 08 Secs (approx)

Total Distance : 128kms

Average Speed : 28 kph (including 30kms of the Paris - Roubaix road surface!!)

Total gain : 354 metres  Total Descent : 367 metres

Max Speed : 50kmh (average pace for Team 3's Time Trial 13km)

The Morning of..........

The day began early for some, 3:30am, as the bus police were out in full force, as some locals appeared to have been out with Sneaky Pete enjoying the Eyre Hotel, and the bus was an easy target.
Little did we know, that there are a couple of  super heroes in our midst, that came to the vulnerable buses help.
The Man from Notting Hill (will forthwith be known as Spike), launched himself to the front door and balcony wearing none other than his underpants, and started berating said intruders with some Africaaaan expletives, while his trusty helper, Grant, had unwittingly discovered that Whyalla had infact stumbled across the first TV remote with mobile phone technology! As he convincingly persuaded the bus vandals that the remote was being used to call the Police!
Disaster averted, and the earliest muppet moment to date, the rest of us, blissfully unaware of the peril the bus had been in, continued our dreamy sleeps and woke to a hot brekky for some of us, and we were on our way.
As I was forced to gaffer tape my antlers to my helmet for an offence that had had a harsh penalty attached, and Fi 2 was discussing the pros and cons of changing her tubular before the much anticipated time trial, we were looking forward to another wind favorable day, with a pitstop out to Point Lowly.
A Brisk pace out to the turn off from the highway and the teams were assembled.
The Girls were ready as the labrapoodles had been released  and the leashes were let go..................and what a rabble. In the excitement of it all and the prospect of smashing the boys off the top of the Dias (not sure how we were at the top in the first place however?) they seem to have forgotten that the operative word was Team time trial as they headed off at breakneck speed, with little Sam charging to the front.  As the girls were herded into some organization by Bra boy Ben, the tempo was now being set, and they were the team to chase down. Later, video evidence showed the 3 girls in an organised formation with one Africaaaaan horse that had bolted from the gate, and was leaving some carnage on the road behind her. I just need to remind people that the reference to young Sam is because she is only 17 yrs old!! And one day she may ride as well as her fashion guru Father Spike!
Team 2 decided it was their time to have a crack and left 2 mins after (or so Bladder's watch had said), and moved off at a pace that would have seen an electric gopher put them to shame! This was short lived however, and the team had taken it upon themselves to smash out a 42kmh headwind pace, and duly paid the price 3kms in, as there was more road kill left behind than we had seen the previous 300kms! 
With the ever patient Team 3 waiting to take to the track, a 15 minute team tactics meeting was held before we pushed off. With Spike leading the way, an orderly and well oiled machine was rolling down the road, with the machine left at the back to bark orders with effortless efficiency, and in no time had the carnage from team 2 in sight, this saw us putting on the anchors prior to running into Curtis in the teams support vehicle. A quick on road brief, and a nature break was soon called for Team 3, as they allowed team 2 to roll on some distance.  Back on after this short interval and the chase of the Bike Society support vehicle, was too good an opportunity to pass up and the rolling pace line was in full effect (there seems to be a lack of video footage of this Pro tour like crew, so you will just have to take my un bias word as part of Team 3).  The flags were in sight and as we gently rolled nextto and past Team 2 over the line, team 2 Captain (Bladder), looked over to team 3 Captain (now known as Stifler, thanks Katherine) with a look of gracious defeat and gently leaned over and whispered "Welcome Back Cotter"!.................Sorry, fell asleep during last blog, due either to sheer fatigue or possibly the inane ramblings of Sneaky Pete?!

Now Oct 29th in real time, but still continuing previous days blog, thanks mainly due to my new house mate Jaws and his recently aquired saddle cream.

Now, after some discussion and excruciating expressions of pain on the girls team faces, as they anxiously awaited the results and official time keeping records, it was decided that they could wait another 100kms before knowing the outcome of the days smashfest, at the days end & debriefing.
As Ben casually referred to our morning tea break as "just a couple of K's up the road", we pushed on for another 15-20k's out to the now much anticipated Point Lowly lighthouse and its view across the gulf.  "A couple of k's he said! This along with some colourful expletives was now being mumbled from a now Rabbies like foaming mouthed puppy, Sneaky Pete, as his eyes now fell upon the beautiful backdrop of the Gas Refinery at Port Bonython, and once again he was a shattered man.

We eventually made it to morning tea, and a very rewarding view for us to take in, and a chance to take some team pics by the lighthouse.  Much discussion had been had over the now infamous dressing down the boys had got from Ben Bra Boy Bade, for an error in judgement and a cardinal road rule broken.  As Safety officer deputy, Bladder not only begrudgingly handed in his badge, but was also in prime position for Muppet glory!
With a quick stop off at the popular gymnastic gym lavatories, and some media committments complete, we headed off down the same road we had come in on, the humour in this had now been completely lost on Sneaky Pete.
We had one more test for a girls v boys time trial, with Spike and daughter Sam, ready to slog out a 2 km TT, and while it was a chilly 19 degrees, there was more perspiration flowing from the brow of our Africaaaaan giant than than we had just seen overlooking the entire Upper Spencer Gulf!  As bladder was backing in the young gun Sam in a desperate attempt to releive himself of the potential wearing of the antlers as the incoming Muppet,.  The odds were now tending towards the big maaaan, but as the pressure built, so did the premptive excuses, and it was dawining on Spike, that potentially he was soon to be the weakest rider in his family, and the determination was evident as he stripped down his bike, dropping the bidons and the heavy weight of that pesky bell! Would this help Spike, or just serve to embarrass & humiliate him further, and the chance of the Maillot Jaune would surely be a distant and iratrievable dream.....................and the race was on......
With the old man being set off first, the hammer was down from the get go and the fear of losing had inspired the legs to actually work harder than his mouth, and a finish line speed with Ben on his wheel was most impressive.  With a minute gap before young Sammy was let out of the blocks by smashfest junkie stifler, the nervous tention ha dincreased as she crossed the line within 60 secs of her father and the slim hope of victory for spike was slipping away.  On an official time keeping protest, initiated by the now shattered man, it appeared that maybe for dramatic effect, the horse had bolted early............and the men were to pick up their first victory, suprisingly by the man in underwear Spike!

We turned North from the turn off to ride out the next 100kms to Pt Augusta and the thought of a BBQ around the Pool and a couple of quiet beers (Sneaky, taking the precedent set by Ben, now beleived that a couple could consist of any number from 2 to 30, and was looking forward to his couple!)had the peleton salivating and a nice tempo was set.
Fi 2's pre conceived mechanical by Sidler, had them change a tubby (tubular tyre) on the Schnell's, and TT back to the group effortlessly, only to have the quiet Davo bust a spoke and be set with a new set of wheels that just happened to be at the bargain Bike Society price of whatever Stifler needed to have to clinch the sale.  A little bit of sabatoure work by curtis the night before, was now paying some good dividends for the Stifler.

With a nature break called to allow a less exhaustive TT back, we had the pleasure of a family stop and pull over on the highway with their caravan, only to come over, introduce themselves and give us their support and then generously donated $50 to the cause.  The real reason they stopped I discovered when the Father explained to me, was his son had just yelled "look Dad! A half dressed woman in the bush!, (we know her as the Fi 1, rapidly becoming bladder 2), to which the Father had no option to stop and investigate such a wild exclamation. This generosity has been felt by the riders all along the way, and while bashing out some long days in the sadddle with ever diminishing stocks of Aussie Butt cream, these are the moments that have us reflecting on why we are out here, and just how kind people can be.  To that family, thank you from the entire team and we will ensure that your best wishes are not wasted.

With 150k's under the belt for the day and a shortcut available to the pool, Ben advised of the route we were about to take. (Ben had done some recon down this road, only it was from the luxurious comfort of a vehicle and certainly not from the saddle), as I quote "it's not that bad, it's pretty good really".  This road puts the Paris - Roubaix to shame, and as we shook & shattered each bone in Bronte's body, the peleton was quite barring pieces of equipment being rocked off of their rides.
A sixteen year olds acne covered face, would have been smoother than any part of the next 30 k's home.
After rattling past the old detention centre at baxter, we arrived at ours!  The beautiful Oasis apartments had us safe and soundly locked inside and provide the entire pool and BBQ area for our own private function.  With the support crew flaring up the Barbie, and Foxy Lady Gangnam styles famous salad, we sat down to a refreshing dip and Lunch, well deserved by all.
A short trip with an aquired trolley to the local bottlo, and we were in for a nice relax and a couple of drinks! (all middies of course).  As a game of trivial pursuit ensued with beer cap questions and stats Stirna on song, copius opened bottles of beer were now scattered around Stifler, Sneaky, Toddly doddly and Stink, that left them with no option but responsibly consume said liquor.

Only dinner left, and the blog could have been completed, only a strategically placed Davo Marada, at the exit of the kitchen had decided that any name, male or female, called out by an exiting Waiter/Waitress with a full plate of food, had now become his!! Only after multiple name disorder Davo, Mike, Helen, Roger had engorged himself on a five course meal, was I able to have somebody's dinner!
A scenic drive back into the tightly secured compound of the Oasis Apartments and a good sleep in a huuuuuge queen bed (thanks Sneaky & Doddly), and prepare for our soon to be longest day in the saddle through the Pichi Richi pass into Quorn and onto Pt Pirie.

Good Luck Guys & Girls, the breakfast will surely see you through till the end!!!

Neil
 Point Lowly
 Spectacular scenery
 Two lighthouses sneaky!
 Ahhh the pool & BBQ
 Too nice
 Guess Who?
 
Stifler (aka 'THE MACHINE')


Another day in the Saddle!

October 27th

Cleve to Whyalla 147kms

Total time 5hrs 14min 32sec (approx)

Average Speed 28.1 kmh

Total gain 670m Total descent 855m

Max Speed 52.3kmh (set by Fi 1 & Fi 2 uphill with a 25 kmh crosswind!)

Wind semi favourable tailwind with a crosswind 50km out of Whyalla


Muppets from space key terminology


Bade : Ben
Chris : The Bladder, Pusher
Craig C : Ironman, The Machine
Steve : Sleepy
Ian : Jaundis (because he sooo much wants to be yellow), Hincapie, or that guy from Notting Hill who opens the door in his underwear.  (more to come on the fashion Guru)
Sam : Sam, the daughter that may possibly beat her father at everything!
Kat : Alex
Fi 1 : the inaugaral Muppet Miss Piggy and currently the Bushmans Blowie title holder!
Fi 2: Fi 2, will sure to pick up another name when she tears everyones legs off during the team time trial!
Alex : Sneaky Pete, Busboy, Arnie (Screamer- this will be after the pubic epilation performed on him)
Craig S: I prefer to unclip lying down, or plain 'Stinky'
Jami : Twinkle Toes
Jack : Button
Peter : Diesel, Thorpie
Dave : Nelson
Todd : The dark Knight, now may be referred to as the 'criminal'
Bronte : Saurus
Jason : Jaws, Jiz, Bro, or any reference to a farm animal he will answer
Neil : Neil, and currently the Muppet (protest pending)

This may make it a little easier for some to follow for future posts.  These are likely to change without warning with the prefix 'formely known as' as time progresses and true personalities and traits are revealed.

How the day rolled...................

A respectable wake up call at 6.15am, for a cracking Brekky put on by Chris & Jane at the Cleve Hotel, and the trusty steeds were released from their night with the grog and lined up outside the pub for a great photo, (Muppet No.1 Endo in front of the group TODD, Muppet No.2 Flyby in front of the group, MISS PIGGY)
As we had been informed at the morning breifing that there was to be a team time trial on Sunday at Point lowly, there was sure to be some sandbagging early in the piece. The Maillot Jaune wearer, Jaws, was well protected in the middle of the pack, once he had actually found his bike, and was happy to have his 53- 43 on as someone had put some little climbs in for us to enjoy as we headed out to the NorthEast and Cowell. (Muppet No.3 Someone had informed Diesel, that the first 30km's out of Cleve was all downhill! Name withheld)
After the peleton had tapped out a nice tempo over the rise and down into Cowell, we enjoyed some sumptuous delights set up by the wonderful support crew and some help from the very generous Brenton of the Cowell Hotel! Thanks mate and hope you got on a winner with the Cox Plate.
There must have been some sugar deficient items on the menu as the rest of this stop as it remains somewhat hazy?! However it appears that there was a fundamental flaw in my plan to pry Jaws away from the sidler (Hincapie), that had me momentarily distracted and potentially heading for the incorrect gender bias amenities, following this a quick safety display through the demonstration, for the benefit of the group, that helmets are best to be worn prior to joining the stationary peleton. A display more of courage and bravery than the ill percieved version of Muppetry!
The previously displayed soft muppet toy was somehow now frimly in my grasp!  With the knowledge that the Man from Notting Hill in his underpants was still among us and the always a willing Chloe, I beleived this to be only short lived, as we still had another 100kms in the day and the night in Whyalla for the mantle to be secured by another willing contender. 
As Busboy was now finding his rhythm and being the weekend, the work excuse could not be used for the bus, I was beginning to wonder if Jaws had not layed the sucker punch to me early, and I was now yearning for the smiling muppet to be prized from the clutches of Miss Piggy, when suddenly all was not lost.............our budding mobile photographer, Chloe,  had picked the perfect moment  for a daring manoeuvre, risking life and limb, to capture what surely would have been a Macquarie photography prize winning photo, only to once again be foiled by that pesky lens cap! (epic Muppet moment No. 40 CHLOE) (Muppet moments No.4 to 39 were duly handed out to that man from Notting Hill wearing his underpants for each individual ring of his beloved bike bell!).

With the passing of some typical Aussie outback vehicles (see attached photo), and safety first Ben's call to have all in, a quick nature break was had for some (another Muppet moment by the Dark Knight for not using the nature break as said nature break and waiting till we were back in the saddle to realise there was some unwanted pressure from his own bladder and not that of the Bladder himself!) After Miss Piggy had changed and inpersonated Terry Irwin with a quick bush walk and investigation into the local wildlife, we moved ever closer to our next stop 40kmh out of Whyalla at a truck stop that had been commandeered by our team and the ravenous bunch dug into another great feed. No Muppet moments at this stop, but surely Chloe had done enough with that hat!

As we gently rolled towards Whyalla and a warm welcome from Leanne and crew at the Maccas, it was noted that the pain dished out from the front of the pack was down to two of the five girls up front. Whilst Ben and Neil, soft pedalled through a leisuirely 28-30kph with the schnell wheels gliding across the outback black top, we rolled over to have young Sam & Alex (formerly known as Kat) enjoy another lovely tapped out tempo. One more roll with 25km to Whyalla as it appeared over the horizon and Fi 1 & Fi 2 hit the front with force.  This is a duo that is like taking two dobermans for a walk and they have just seen a chihauhua and a labrapoodle and they havent eaten for a week! (sorry for the Kanine analogy girls, but it was for the visual). There is no doubting these girls ability and neither the false flat or the strong crosswind was going to save the labrapoodle.  The pace had risen and the peloton had become a breakaway, peleton, and grupetto with the sprinters out the back somewhere.  The odds on the team time trial have swung dramatically in favour of the girls & Ben, with no weak links yet to appear in their group. (Chris's team may be in with a chance, if Sneaky Pete is allowed to use the bus!)
One more roll over to allow the schnell wheels to bring us home in a more relaxed fashion and some preservation for the upcoming TTT.  A quick stop at Whyalla Maccas for icecream and a look at the great effort that had been done to help raise more funds for the charity. Great work Guys & Girls.

A gentle stroll back to the Westlands for some hot showers, swims and the now much loved massage by helping hands Wendy and Foxy to be ready for the big races tomorrow.
A little suprise Ben had us all do in the morning, was to write something down that no one knew about you, and the opportunity to guess who was what or had these strange and obsure traits, made for a very entertaining and amusing dinner with young Sam proving that some cheating works and is quite alright, isnt it Lance?? A nice little gift from Perko and the unvailing of the coveted Maillot Jaune and the dubious passing on of the Muppet award.
Much to her suprise, the ever thoughtful Jaws duly presented Chloe one of our support crew with the Jersey as the man from Notting Hill wearing his underpants was being treated by Medic Dr Tony for a mild case of cardiomyopathy! On behalf of the entire riding team, it was Jizzes pleasure to hand over the yelow albeit he no longer has a shadow, to Chloe and the support crew for their work during the day & night to make this ride the pleasure that it has been.  Thanks again guys and girls, you are doing the hard work, the rest of us are just here for the ride!

After  numerous Muppet moments during the course of the day, including some poor performances in the front bar by Sneaky Pete and Stinky on the Cox plate,  the passing of the baton was done, and I appear to be the Muppet for this next leg of our journey, as Ben and Jaws set out to Handicap the Machines Time Trial Team.

Teams for Time Trial

Team 1 : Girls Team - Ben, Miss Piggy, Fi 2, Alex (Kat), Africaaaaaaan Saaaaaam

Team 2 : Bladder, Jaws, Diesel, Twinkle Toes, Sneaky Pete, The criminal, The man from Nottinghill wearing his underpants

Team 3 : Machine, Muppet, Stinky, Nelson, Button, Brontesaurus, Steve

I need to confer these teams with the referee prior to confirmation of accuracy.

Individual TT events for charity and embarrasing grown me from Notting Hill that wear their underpants.

Africaaaaaaaan Sam V Man from Notting Hill wearing his underpants (Daughter V Father)

Odds on favourite Sam at 2.7:1 with every possibility that the other runner is put down, prior to his place at the starting line. 5:1 for the old man. $20 a rider for a ringside ticket to this performance, just see Bladder boy.

Lead riders TT

The Bladder V Ben V The Machine Odds yet to confirmed by resident book Craig 'Waterhouse' Stirna.  $10 a rider to see some damage done to the big guns of the peloton!

So we feverishly await the next day like excited little children the night before Christmas, with the knowledge that hopefully someone will produce a memorable muppet moment that will relieve me of the current burden I carry upon these shoulders, and that the pace again will be one that gets us all to Port Augusta safe and sound.
Till then sleep well and we will speak again shortly.

Hi to Katherine, Jackson, Tayla and Spencer and see you soon in Pirie. Love Dad.

 Muppets
 Truck stop 45 km out of Whyalla
 Where's Ian?
 Little Toy trucks!
 Idiots!
 Truckstop lunch
 A little too happy to have the Muppet!
 Another Feast, well done Guys & Girls
 Next Turn?!
Chris and the gang at Cleve
 
 
Neil










Friday 26 October 2012

The Tour begins!!

25th October 2012

The Team assembles for meet & Greet and a great nights send off (Thanks Big Tony!)

Well the game playing and banter has continued from some previous meetings and was well underway, as early as the airport the first kiwi jokes had started for Jason Jaws.  
There was a quick noisy flight across the gulf for most of the riders, that were pleased to know that they had not only avoided the early morning rise of the support crew, but also not having to see their breakfast twice!! As the ferry ride across the gulf took its toll on most of the support crew.  The things the support crew are willing to endure and suffer for the greater cause are much appreciated by all.

Having assembled everybody at the very fancy Port Lincoln Hotel for our Pre ride briefing, after ensuring our rides had been expertly put back together by the team, Craig & Kurtis from bike society. Thanks guys!
Team briefing by Bade or was that Ben? was organised, and we were quickly sent off to our luxurious Port Lincoln Hotel rooms with kit, laundry bags, Aussie butt cream and bidons, to get ready for the Celebration community event put on by Port Lincoln, with a huge effort by Local Maccas Licensee, Tony Baj and his wife Gina.
Huge turnout and some fantastic auction items.  After Bade had managed to pry his way from the Ladies table, we got into the auction, with the chance for one of us to try out a new profession of spotting! Unfortunately I will still be a licensee for the time being as there was some confusing signals from Jaws, that appeared to be bids of increments that neither himself or I had any idea of what they were! I think he may have ended up with some women's Jewellery for an undisclosed Bank SA price!
We had the pleasure of Kaarle McCulloch at the night with her London Olympics Bronze medal, to give us an insight into here Life as cycling professional and an Olympian and triple World Champion.
She also did a great job auctioning off some items and helping us raise over $11,000 for the night.
Fantastic job from the Port Lincoln community and who truly got behind the charity, as we all know that a signed Warren Treadrea ball shouldn't cost that much! So thank you so much to all of you that got involved in the bidding and made for a fun night.
After we departed a little too early, sorry guys, we were following sneaky Pete at the head of the peloton, we made our way off for a nice couple of hours rest before the big day!
Some anxious moments had been had as Jaws pulled a line from 'Top Gun' "so Neil, have you worked it out yet? Worked out what? Who's the best? As he sauntered away with a swagger that suggested he knew!

October 26th........The day has arrived.......we finally get to roll out

Well 3k's out to the local school, St Joseph's, to a rousing reception and to some very excited and orderly young school kids, for the first of our five school visits during the ride.
A quick chat with Kaarle, a bike safety talk be Ben & to draw out the winner of the Bike society donated bike for one young lad, and some Bank SA packs for five other kids.
St Joseph's had had a ride your bike to school day and a casual day to raise some funds, and graciously handed over a cheque for $600!! Great job guys.
As we left the school under the careful guidance of Ben & Kaarle under the schools line of honor, we were truly about to start this journey......

Day 1  Port Lincoln to Cleve 148kms

Total time 4hrs 34mins 13secs (approx)

Average speed 32.4 kmh (nice for the first day!)

Total gain 789m total descent 593m

Wind South Westerly 25kmh (just what we ordered)

Max Speed 55kmh

Well, what a first hit out.  To all riders and support crew and the wind, well done to all on what was a great first day. Even if sneaky Pete did take a ride on the not so well bus with Foxy from Tumby Bay to Arno Bay, where the girls in the peleton did some damage to the group with a cracking pace that was tempered down on the last 30 k's into Cleve thankfully.
The group got into formation early and six brave souls sat at the front to take 20min rollovers between them while the rest of us sat and enjoyed the first 50k's into Tumby.  Well that was until the 40k mark when Arnie (Sneaky Pete) decided that a heart rate nearing 200bpm and smashing out 44kph uphill was not his idea of a leisurly pace!! Maybe it was those hairy legs sneaky? or that huge upper frame of yours!
Some early mechanicals gave Craig 'The Machine' Ironman a chance to test out his new supersonic ride to bring Jaws and himself back to the pack with a 55kph time trial! I reckon Jaws would have had that 42 on the back rocking.

Other than that pretty uneventful ride with a lovely tailwind up to Tumby for a well deserved coffee and cake, all done by our fantastic support crew, Grant, Foxy, Wheeler Dealer Karl, Tony, Chloe, Sam, Kurtis and Wendy.
Out of Tumby and onto Arno Bay for a 70km stretch that was to be at a muscle hurting pace for the first 40 km, with the bus struggling to keep up! Then Twinkle Toes turn to have a puncture, only as a result of the inaugaral 'Muppet' award winner Fi, dropping her bottle at the head of pack. Thanks Fi (Miss Piggy), for doing this while I was next to you, much appreciated you keeping me out of harms way.
As for the pace, not sure who was the main perpetrator of this speed with the front six being, Diesel, Neil, Dave, the two Fi's and Chris the pusher. Me thinks that Chris and Diesel were sent to the front to get the first Lasagne at the Arno Bay pub, and were not letting anyone get there first, until dave and Fi 1 hit the front and smashed out a pace that would have them tucking into the first slice of lasagne!
All settled down after a great meal at the pub and only 30k's to head up to Cleve to finish the day,
that would have been the case if Foxy hadnt first left Chloe without a ride home as she drove off without her and then decided to turn the opposite way down the road than the peloton to get a picture of us. As we were now 2kms down the highway in the opposite direction, this was now a somewaht difficult task for Foxy and camera! Ben or Bade? then put a nice casual tempo down with the African connection Sam at the front and the rest in tow.  Bronte and Jami had been having the pleasurable feel of Ironmans hands on there well worn knicks as the machine helped them up the last couple of climbs.  I am starting to think that Craig either enjoys pain or just likes the feel of lycra? Hats off to you Craig as you are one heck of a fit boy and are a great asset to the group. Stinky Stirna managed to stay upright the whole day on the bike much to the suprise of the group, especially as he has now decided to unclip those hairy legs, standing up! 

Everywhere that Stevie went Ian was sure to go............as Steve had been issued for some obscure reason the much coveted 'Yellow Jersey' on the first day, he enjoyed a much protected ride in the middle of the pack.  This was mainly by his new domestique import from South Africa Ian 'Hincapie' Frometin. The holder of the Jersey passes on the jersey for those most deserving the following night.
Much to Ians horror of his day of Laundry, door opening and other domestique duties, some dealings had been done between Stevie and the now incumbent Jersey holder Jaws after they had roomed together the night before!? Good work Jaws, and well deserved, although I did lose some money on the Stirna Tab as my money was on "the Machine'.
As we had belted out a pace that saw us stop on side of the road before Cleve, so they had time to gather and close off the main road for us, the first intermediate sprint was handed to me by Todd as we passed the line at a breakneck pace of around 17k's. We had decided to not inform any other riders of this sprint, for an unfair advantage which was duly upheld. Ben, where is the Green Jersey?
Another great turnout by the locals, this time in Cleve, with a street party and a prize to be won by a very cold and wet little lad that had just come from swimming lessons to collect his prize of a brand new bike.  The look on his face was priceless, as he first sat on, and then slipped off his sparkling new ride.  Chris and family at the Cleve Hotel, then locked up our bikes in the most secure place in Cleve, the Beer shed, and then sat us down for the days debreifing by Ben and a snitzel fest (did anyone try the fish?), and had all our sleeping arrangements in order.  If you ever get the chance to stop in and say hello and have a beer with Chris and co, do yourself a favour and do it, what great hospitality from this town and family, thank you heaps guys.
Another little auction and another $3000 to the total from the locals of Cleve, Thank you.
I was then sent on my way to complete some blogging and bring you up to date with the ride.  We will have a more than casual roll out tomorrow one thinks with Jaws being protected by Ian 'Hincapie' for his chance of donning on the 'Yellow Jersey' after day two.
What will day two bring with Kat & Jack the quiet achievers, ready to shake things up?
All off to sleep now, and look forward to knocking off another 150k's of the total tomorrow as we creep closer to our destination.

 Kaarle and Bronze Medal giving away the bike!
 Bank SA starter kits winners
 First Team photo at Lincoln Oct 26th
The peleton!
 10k's out of Cleve (nature break)
 Cool kids & staff of St Joseph's
 Yellow Jersey & Jaws moving in!
The Start

Good Luck and sleep well all, its on again in the morn!!!

Neil